Why Are “Women Dump Cooks” So Mad At EL BROOKMAN?

ZZZdump-cakes-large-9 What I am about to tell you is shocking. I do want all of you to know I am safe and can handle myself as well as any caged writer. 

My views are off the charts on my blog because of one article that is being viewed daily at the rate of 100 to 1 views over any other posting.  I am being read from all over the world; Brazil, Indonesia, Australia, France, Japan, England, Canada, Korea, Ukraine, Russia, Israel, Italy, Germany, and many more places, but mostly in the United States.

My email address that appears on my blog, elbrookman@outlook.com is filled daily with insults and anger coming from WOMEN.

Is it one of my poems reflecting my genius, so lyrical and captivating? Nope.

Is it one of my short stories? Nope.

Certainly it must be one of my more political or theological satire pieces of prose? Nope.

It was a quickly done, throw away short piece. A snarky article about the most unappealing recipe book and way of cooking. It must say something more about the time we live in then I had originally thought. It is entitled; “DUMP CAKES, DUMP DINNERS…..COOKS TAKING A DUMP.” https://elbrookman.com/2014/01/10/dump-cakes-dump-dinners-cooks-taking-a-dump/

Here are some examples of my emails.

“You obviously don’t cook for your family. More than likely you don’t have a wife or girlfriend because you must expect your meals served on a silver platter. Arrogant idiot, Get Over yourself !”

Valerie

 

This person must be so angry they forgot to use spell-check….

“Let me tell you several things. After 30 yesrs of marriage I have observed most families do eat box cakes. Also most middle american families do not even eat dinners as fancy or costly as dump dinners. Most women are not from scratch cooks. Women no longer have home ecimomics like I had in the 1960’s. Have you all priced everything you would need to cook from scratch ?? Get off your self ritous horse.”

Mary

 

(I really don’t know who the “you all” she refers to, but it is nice to know she thinks I have a staff of “you all” that writes for me.)

 

“ELBROOKMAN YOU ARE A FUCKING JERK ! MY KIDS EAT DUMP CAKES AND LOVE THEM, AND THE DUMP DINNERS TOO. YOU ARE A BIG ASSHOLE.”

TONYA

 

(Tonya, besides the Dump Cakes, and Dump Dinners your kids love, I am sure they love kissing mommy’s Dump Mouth.)

 

“I want to take a big dump and make you eat it. Bastard. How dare you insult what I feed to my GrandKids.”

Nanny Joan

Over 100 emails  are being ‘dumped” on me weekly.

What is wrong with you women feeding your kids hamburger meat that you don’t even take the time to separate or cook first so that you can remove some of the excess grease and so that it doesn’t look like cooked worms? Don’t you know about things like texture, taste, and presentation?

ZZZZ000124JO55UOWomen have suffered a nervous breakdown about food and should turn the cooking over to men and commit themselves into cooking classes or psycho-therapy sessions. Makes me wonder what madness the female gender is experiencing.

 

 

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Categories: Humor, Life, Observations, People, Places

Tags: , , , , , ,

7 replies

  1. The idea of “dump meals” totally gross me out! I’m with you when you ask “Don’t you know about things like texture, taste, and presentation?”
    Also it’s usually more economic and healthier to cook from scratch. It does take way more time though.
    But people do love to hate.

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    • Thanks for the comment Nights7…..I was thinking just me and Gordon Ramsey were interested in quality food :~)

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      • Food texture, mixture (preferably lack there of), and color are very important to me. Plus putting the word dump in a recipe title makes it grossly unappealing.

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      • You think the same as I do on this…..my first article said the marketers are laughing all the way to the bank. No one in their right mind would use the word “DUMP” to sell food…..And by the way….that fry pan they are selling along with the recipes for $10 dollar is called ORGREENIC”….it is green, and not organic…lol.

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      • Orgreenic…ironic marketing at its finest.
        I just read your original article; it’s pretty funny.

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  2. dear Brookman, i just left a posting on your other blog. i wanted to add to this new blog since i just saw the link. i want to applaude you for being brave enough to post your viewpoints. im not being sarcastic. im also personally amazed as to how many women are so freakin angry. they’re lashing out like they’re the product owner! its sad but strangely funny how easy it is to anger people in this day and age. your a great sport for putting up with the overwhelming negative feedback. i also have to comment about the special offer of the orgreenic pan. seems ironic that this marketing strategy is trying to sell a shitty pan with a shitty food product. i tried the orgreenic… worse pan ever! the green part actually turned black while i was trying to make eggs. i returned it and purchased a pan i know is good (caphalon) and havent had a problem since. either way, thank yoy for your post on both this blog and the other one (dump cakes.. dump cooks). i fully enjoyed both. the angry people can put a sock in it and stop takin things so personally.
    take care! 🙂

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  3. Seriously, I think we should all quit cooking and just make smoothies. Throw in some raw spinach with strawberries and the kids won’t know the difference. I especially like the many flavors offered by one special nutrition company that I won’t name, but they’ve been around a long time and their protein shakes are more nutritious than any food. It’s quick and easy to whip one of these up. Don’t even need my teeth anymore and I’m really healthy for an old woman. Survived cancer 25 years, too, thanks to this good nutrition. No dump cakes, no dump casseroles, no need to chew. Good, honest, liquid nutrition.

    Like

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