STOP THE PRESSES….BANNER HEADLINE…CALL ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX NEWS AND ALERT GORDON RAMSEY
CATHY MITCHELL recipe queen of DUMP CAKES, DUMP DINNERS
HAS INVITED EL BROOKMAN TO HER PLACE FOR THANKSGIVING.
Well, she still seems angry, and I do have to respond to her. Here is her recent correspondence. You can tell she loves the EL.
Not certain inviting someone to proclaim to the world that they are an idiot because they admitted to buying my book qualifies as “good press” but I’m a good sport. Find it interesting that the anonymity of the internet encourages people to say all the mean things about people that they would never say to their face. Also think its strange how every comment section sooner or later manages to get political even if the subject is dump cakes, ie You bought the dumpcake cookbook?…I bet you voted for Obama! Cant compete with Gordon Ramsey but you are certainly welcome to share Thanksgiving…I assure you there will be lots of Football, delicious food and absolutely no dumping until after dinner. Cathy
And here is The EL’s Reply;
Of course I would say these things to your face, I am EL BROOKMAN. That is my picture, these are my words, hear me howl! I am a real person and never have flown under the radar or anonymity of the internet. In my life I have had much press, and I assure you, for the most part people only remember your face or name and or the product. Never remember if press was bad or good, unless of course your name and face is Monica Lewinski.
The only reason politics started in the conversation thread, was because one of your pro-Dump Dinner & Dump Cakes fans made the statement I was “resistant to change.” Of course I made a flippant remark that he must have voted for Obama, the Hope & Change guy. And yes, I have made some other references to our culture about the popularity of your cookbooks and style of cooking and liking it to the “dumbing down of America” & “dumping down of America.”
Pretty catchy don’t you think? That is EL at his best. A humorous man who writes political satire and comments about American culture. I also have a brilliant gift of writing poetry and words so tender, soft, and filled with pain that it can make Angels weep.
Once people catch on that I actually admire you, and have made you a very noticeable icon of American Culture, then it just isn’t as funny anymore.
I told Gordon Ramsey I will not be coming to his house for Thanksgiving, but am going to Cathy Mitchell’s house, Queen of the Dump Dinners & Dump Cakes for Dump Turkey with all the Dump Trimmings. Gordon just said; “Oh fuck me, you got big bullocks.”
I will be happy to come to your house for Thanksgiving. Your house isn’t a dump is it? See, that’s funny Cathy. Life, food, drinking, is all about the good times and laughs between us humans. I miss all my family members who have passed on. We all made fun of each other and our quirks as human beings. You would have loved my Uncle Carmen who took his Thanksgiving dinner to his car to eat alone, a perfect place to eat a Dump Cake.
Cathy, we are all here for such a short time. Live large and love as much as you can, and make fun and laughter of everything.
p.s. Not sure if you are married, but if your husband eats a lot of turkey it will put him asleep and we can go out to your gazebo with a bottle of wine.
Categories: Family, Humor, Life, Observations, People, Places, Politics
If I inquire what your most intriguing P.S. has ever been, would I get an email demonstrating?
Stephanie, …. first time I’ve ever called you that. I will send you an email. I am honored to be a part of your menopausal condition. I will do whatever you ask of me because in your condition no one should ever say “no” to you.
Love, and I do mean “love.”
p.s. Not the seedy, bus station bathroom kind of love with holes in the stalls, but the kind of love a romantic man has for his woman. A real woman, not the kind you have to blow up. I do not have your email address. Just send me your email address to email@example.com
My comment above was for Stephanie to do a comedic “spit-take” while having her coffee in the morning. Anyone who knows me, is aware I have never been in a Bus depot bathroom in my entire life, and I apologize to Greyhound for my remark. However I did have a blow-up family consisting of a rubber wife and rubber kids I would take to the mall shopping and we would eat in the food-court and buy rubber food.